Jodi Carlton, MEd

"Why Won't My Autistic Partner Compliment Me?" with Jodi Carlton & Mona Kay

729 views · 5d ago · 14:31

Is it common for autistic partners to not compliment their partner's appearance? In this episode, Mona and I unpack one of the most common complaints in neurodiverse relationships — the lack of affirmations — and reveal why it's often a sign of a fundamentally different way of experiencing love, not a lack of caring. Plus, for those wondering if this behavior suggests narcissism, we've included a "secret clue" that helps distinguish neurotype differences from narcissism.

Topics: Welcome & checking in · Listener question: Do autistic partners not compliment appearance? · The common complaint: "My partner said absolutely nothing" · When negative comments come out without hesitation · Why compliments feel uncomfortable for autistic folks · Informational honesty vs. emotional connection

Are You Accommodating Them… or Abandoning Yourself?

263 views · 1w ago · 10:40

When does accommodating a neurodivergent partner become self-abandonment? Understanding autism, ADHD, emotional dysregulation, sensory needs, and executive functioning differences can make an enormous difference in a relationship—but accommodation should never mean accepting harm.

Sexual Consent & Abuse in Neurodiverse Relationship - Podcast

727 views · 2w ago · 22:18

When a partner claims that autism means they "don't understand consent," where does neurodivergence end and abuse begin? Mona Kay and I unpack the difference between autistic behavior and abusive behavior, why "no means no" applies regardless of neurotype, and how media scripts and porn can distort expectations around consent for black-and-white thinkers.

Topics: Episode Intro · Content Warning & Listener Question · Abuse vs. Autistic Behavior · Abuse Is Not Autism · Any Neurotype Can Be Abusive · "Your Safety Is What Matters"

Is it Clueless Harm or Cruelty & Abuse in Your Neurodiverse Relationship?

591 views · 3w ago · 11:37

Clueless harm and intentional harm can look surprisingly similar in neurodiverse relationships, especially on the receiving end. In this video, I explore the complicated intersection of neurodivergence, narcissistic abuse, trauma, and relationship harm.

Neurodivergence & Medical Gaslighting: It's Not All in Your Head | S6E10

659 views · 1mo ago · 17:40

Medical gaslighting is when your experience of your body is denied or dismissed by a medical professional. Neurodivergent people frequently experience this even though providers don't always realize the harm they're doing.

Topics: Checking In · Neurodivergence & the Physical Body · Migraines & Dysautonomia · Depression as a Physical Experience · Depression Is Physical, Not Just Mental · What Is Dysautonomia?

Not a Deal Breaker: Hope for Neurodiverse Couples - S6E9

927 views · 1mo ago · 22:08

What happens when two people in a neurodiverse relationship remember the same conversation completely differently? Take my Master Course: How to Communicate in Your Neurodiverse Relationship at This week, in episode 9 of Season 6, Mona and I explore the memory and communication disconnects that can put neurodiverse couples in what I call “the boxing ring”—where partners become opponents, each trying to prove who’s right and who’s wrong.

Topics: When memory differences feel like gaslighting · Meet the hosts: Mona Kay & Jodi Carlton · Memory, meaning, and where neurodiverse couples miss each other · Accuracy vs. emotional connection: the core disconnect · Sarah's story: getting stuck on every wrong detail · The boxing ring: when couples become opponents

Why Your ADHD Brain Forgets Everything (Except What It Loves): S6E8

656 views · 2mo ago · 24:32

This week we're getting really personal. We're opening up about our own ADHD brains — the things we've struggled with, the stuff that drove our partners crazy, and the moments that only made sense once we finally understood neurodivergence. If you've ever felt like your brain works differently from everyone else's, or like your partner's special interests leave you feeling invisible, you're not alone. We've been there too.

Topics: When a partner's special interest makes you invisible · Today's topic: executive functioning challenges · Jodi's ADHD spotted while editing the podcast · Feeling invisible when a partner locks in · ADHD vs autistic hyperfixation: how long is too long? · Memory struggles: locked in but can't remember a thing

"There Might Be Zero Sex" — The Truth About Intimacy in Neurodiverse Relationships

2.2K views · 2mo ago · 16:25

If you're in a neurodiverse relationship — whether you're ADHD, autistic, or both — intimacy can be one of the most complicated things to navigate. In this episode, Mona Kay & I get real about love vs. sex, masking in the bedroom, asexuality, ethical non-monogamy, separate bedrooms, and the hidden pattern that quietly undermines intimacy for neurodiverse couples: fawning.

Topics: Love vs. Sex Myths · Masking & Mismatched Scripts · Asexuality & Misalignment · Get Help Early · Find Neurodivergent-Fluent Support · Creative Relationship Solutions

Neurodiversity in Marriage: The Undressing Intimacy Podcast

647 views · 2mo ago · 53:59

Neurodiversity in marriage simply means each partner operates on completely different cognitive, emotional, and relational "wiring." In this episode of the "Undressing Intimacy" podcast, I was honored to be a guest and talk with hosts Greg and Amy Langford about the strengths and challenges of being a neurodiverse couple.

Topics: Meet Jodi Carlton – Neurodiverse Relationship Expert · Difference vs. Deficit: Jodi's Personal Journey · Biggest Misconceptions About Neurodiversity · Neurodivergence in Relationships & Couples · The Pause Button: Calming the Nervous System · Physical & Sexual Intimacy in Neurodiverse Relationships

Is this Sabotaging Intimacy in Your Neurodiverse Relationship? S6E6 with Jodi Carlton & Mona Kay

664 views · 2mo ago · 19:03

If you're in a neurodiverse relationship — whether you're ADHD, autistic, or both — intimacy can be one of the most complicated things to navigate. In this episode, Mona Kay & I get real about routines, spontaneity, physical intimacy, and the hidden pattern that quietly undermines intimacy for neurodiverse couples: fawning.

Topics: Routines, Structure & the ADHD/Autistic Couples · Date Night Strategies That Work for Both Partners · Physical Intimacy & Predictable Patterns · Communicating About Sex — When, How & Why Not During · Sex & Vulnerability · Codependency, Fawning & People-Pleasing in the Bedroom