Gay Men Going Deeper is a YouTube Series and Podcast about personal development, sexuality, and mental health. Brought to you by the Gay Men’s Brotherhood an…
58:021K views · 1w ago · 58:02
3300 episodes over six years. A lot has changed. For our 300th episode, Michael, Matt, and Reno are back together at the mic for the first time in three months to look back at where Gay Men Going Deeper started, how we’ve changed along the way, and what we’re still figuring out.
44:561.8K views · 3w ago · 44:56
Growing up gay shapes you. Even if you had a relatively good experience, many of us learned to hide parts of ourselves, seek approval, stay guarded, or adapt in order to feel safe, accepted, or lovable. Over time, those survival strategies can quietly shape our relationships, confidence, intimacy, and sense of self.
1:05:151.9K views · 1mo ago · 1:05:15
Guest: Growing Up Different
Growing up different can leave a lasting impact on how we see ourselves, our relationships, and our sense of belonging. Even years later, many gay men still carry the feeling of being on the outside looking in—surrounded by people, yet not truly known.
39:121.4K views · 1mo ago · 39:12
Apps are a huge part of modern gay life. We delete them, reinstall them, swear them off, go back on, and keep trying to figure out whether they’re helping us connect or quietly getting in the way. In this episode, we’re talking about app seasonality: that on-again, off-again relationship many gay men have with the apps, and the skill of knowing when they’re serving you, when they’re draining you, when to use them...and when to lose them.
38:163.2K views · 2mo ago · 38:16
Why do the guys who are a little distant, a little edgy, and a little hard to get feel so magnetic? Is it actually attraction... or is a deeper pattern being activated? In this episode, we unpack what’s going on underneath the pull toward “bad boys” and why it can feel so intense, compelling, and hard to walk away from.
32:432.8K views · 2mo ago · 32:43
Intimacy sounds like something we all want, but being truly seen can feel terrifying. In this episode, we talk about why fantasy often feels safer than reality, why vulnerability can feel exposing, and how the fear of rejection keeps many gay men hiding behind performance. We also get personal about our own struggles with being seen, how this shows up in dating.
56:531.2K views · 3mo ago · 56:53
Seeking validation isn’t just about chasing likes. It’s the part of us that needs approval, wants to belong, and feel accepted. In this episode, we unpack the subtle ways validation-seeking still shows up in our everyday lives, especially as gay men who learned early to scan, adapt, perform, and manage how we’re perceived. We talk about the difference between healthy feedback and outsourcing your self-worth, and what it actually looks like to build self-trust in real life.
38:46851 views · 3mo ago · 38:46
Feeling bad is not a flaw in the human experience. It’s an essential life skill for anyone who wants a life of love, growth, satisfaction, and intimacy— all of it requires the capacity to feel discomfort without running from it. In this episode, Michael and Matt make the case for feeling bad on purpose: when to sit with an emotion, when to change your mindset, and why emotional avoidance often costs us more than the original pain.
55:491.7K views · 4mo ago · 55:49
A lot of gay men pride themselves on being “nice”— easygoing, agreeable, low-drama. But what if that’s exactly why you’re not getting what you want? In this episode, we break down the difference between being kind and being “nice,” and how approval-seeking, conflict avoidance, and over-accommodating are quietly killing attraction, respect, and real connection.
33:581.4K views · 4mo ago · 33:58
Hookups get a bad rap as shallow, transactional, or disconnected. But what if they could actually become a space for growth, awareness, and real connection? In this episode, we’re advocating for shift from default, unconscious hookups to something more intentional, honest, and grounded. We explore how hookup culture can either reinforce negative patterns or become a powerful mirror for your patterns, desires, boundaries, and capacity for intimacy.
1:01:231.5K views · 4mo ago · 1:01:23
For many gay men, our relationship with our dad is one of the most defining- and least talked about. In this episode, we explore the nuances of our relationships with our fathers through three core questions How did your dad react when you came out? How do you express your gayness around him today? being gay impact the level of intimacy you have with your dad?
38:313.9K views · 5mo ago · 38:31
A lot of gay men take pride in being independent, self-sufficient and in control. But is there a shadow side? When the time comes to let someone in, ask for support, or even rely on others—it feels uncomfortable, exposing, even threatening.
50:552.1K views · 5mo ago · 50:55
There’s something unique about friendships between gay and straight men. They often feel easy, natural, and unexpectedly intimate. In this episode, we explore the unique reasons why gay and straight men are drawn towards each other. From male bonding and emotional intimacy to validation, and the freedom to drop the “rules” of being a man, these friendships often offer something both sides aren’t getting elsewhere.
35:48976 views · 6mo ago · 35:48
We’ve all dealt with them. And maybe we’ve probably been one too... In this episode, we unpack what’s really going on beneath hate. Not just online trolls or obvious critics, but the subtle ways judgment, resentment, and animosity show up in everyday life.
35:281.6K views · 6mo ago · 35:28
What if the things you turn to for fun, pleasure, and productivity are also the ways you avoid your life? In this episode, we explore escapism through a grounded, real-world lens. Not necessarily as a clinical issue, but as a pattern most of us fall into without realizing it.
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